What's Jalopniks beef with Audi?

"BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather" (bugeyedacura) 06/10/2016 at 07:05 • Filed to: None

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First the new S4 gets thrashed, and then a new article comes out yesterday bashing the new lineup for not looking “different enough”. Are you kidding me? Is this purely for views, or has Jalopnik front-paged people that care more about a new cars “looks” than its technology?

Oh, and you cant get the new S4 in a manual, so it doesn’t matter apparently. Are you serious? Look I absolutely love the B8, but the B9 S4 Will blow it out of the water. Because Audi is conservatively quoting times for the car that are a bit faster than the old ones actual tested numbers. Audi underquotes how fast it’s cars are every time. In reality, we may be looking at a car that will be up to a half second faster to 60. Not something to trivialize.

Seriously. Where’s the beef?

Leon711 > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:32

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Because hive mind.

LongbowMkII > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:35

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Technology?

Turbos, AWD and fat, sticky tires. Woooooo!

If Audi is always conservative you can’t really compare their previous underrated 0-60 to your hypothetical one and claim a full half second.

I like the new B9's design, but I also recognize that it's not so different from the B8.

TractorPillow > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:40

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Beats me. I can't say Audi does much for me either though

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:40

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Judging by your name and avatar you are clearly a VW fanboy, no? I think the beef is yours against anyone who disparages a VAG product.

Audia has been making the same car in different sizes for years now.

Party-vi > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:40

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2011:

2015:

2017:

Plus, I can’t tell the difference between an A4 and A6, which is ridiculous. At least BMW has the courtesy to provide new headlights with each generation (minus the E30/E21)

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > LongbowMkII 06/10/2016 at 07:41

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The platform is all new which reduces weight by a little over 100lbs, Audi Virtual Cockpit, and an all new engine are not small things to ignore. I’m sorry but you’re just ignoring his much this car has changed. And if you look at the power curve for the old and new engines, half a second may be optimistic but it will still be a bigger difference than you want to admit.

jkm7680 > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:42

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I’d like to know the exact same thing.

The reason the B9 S4 isn’t offered in manual because the majority of people that bought the B8/.5 didn’t buy it in manual. It’s what the actual consumer wants vs. what the entitled auto community who can’t even afford one wants.

There’s always somebody on FP bitching about Audi. Whether it be about reliability, or styling. And whoever thinks a Ford Fusion can compete with an Audi is delirious.

And Demuro just has a grudge against Audi. He’s literally always bitching and moaning about some aspect of them.

jkm7680 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2016 at 07:48

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Look at every single BMW since 2007 and come back to me.

Svend > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:48

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I think to a degree many want to see a design evolution and not just have an unseen engineering evolution. In cars they want to see an actual difference, for some it’s to show off that they can afford a new and better car, for some it’s something that visually sets it apart from the previous car.

No two car people are the same, we all look for different things in different cars.

yamahog > jkm7680 06/10/2016 at 07:50

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Just because they both have commercial success with evolutionary design doesn’t contradict anything essextee said.

jkm7680 > yamahog 06/10/2016 at 07:51

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I’m just saying everybody is guilty of it. Not just Audi.

whoarder is tellurium > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:51

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It is hip to hate. FP hates the G3x and Z too.

LongbowMkII > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:52

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This platform isn’t all new. Virtual Cockpit has been covered many times before. And the only interesting thing about the engine is that it's reverse flow which is no longer all that rare.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 07:53

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change isn;t always a good thing.....

yamahog > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:54

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People had the same issue with the sixth gen Camaro not looking different enough from the fifth at release, and a year later, it’s getting mostly good press for its performance. I’m sure Audi will be in a similar situation once the press starts getting its hands on cars (and hopefully not crashing them, cough cough).

duurtlang > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:56

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I can’t speak for anyone else, but when it comes to Audi I’m very strongly in the “impressive, but meh” camp. As if we’re talking about household appliances with great characteristics. They perform their task perfectly, but they don’t increase my heartbeat in any way.

Having said that, I have this sentiment with the vast majority of the current competition as well.

OPPOsaurus WRX > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 07:57

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whos got beef with Audi ?!?!?

FSI - alcohol enthusiast with a car problem > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2016 at 07:57

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Have you ever seen the current Mercedes C-, E- and S-Class as well as their SUVs?

jjhats > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 08:02

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they hate america and have for a while. they have completely killed the stick in all models. that takes talent as very few companies offer zero sticks let alone a sporting brand like audi

Party-vi > OPPOsaurus WRX 06/10/2016 at 08:02

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The E39 is just like every other BMW - awesome to people that don’t own them, and shitty to the people that do. See: E46, E60, etc.

GhostZ > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 08:04

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They’re not interesting, and they’re not doing anything interesting, but yet they still have to report on it.

Jalopnik makes their money by offering a different opinion/perspective to every outlet that just reads the press kit and cites ‘better numbers’ as improvement.

OPPOsaurus WRX > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 08:12

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i was talking more about style.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > GhostZ 06/10/2016 at 08:15

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Actually they addressed the numbers and apparently they’re not improved ‘enough’ for their liking. Because they don’t understand what a torque curve is.

Party-vi > OPPOsaurus WRX 06/10/2016 at 08:15

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In that case yes, give me an F10 wrapped up in an E39 chassis.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2016 at 08:16

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No, my beef is with sub-par journalism. Read the articles, they come off as personal. Like Audi ran over their dear old grandma.

Party-vi > whoarder is tellurium 06/10/2016 at 08:17

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That’s because the G35/G37 are RWD Altimas. Ride is harsh and jarring, engine is buzzy and unrefined, and maintenance are all issues.

whoarder is tellurium > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 08:18

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Oh, ok.

I better get rid of mine ASAP. My Audi too.

LongbowMkII > jkm7680 06/10/2016 at 08:24

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Why get an S4? Straight line speed and the badge?

Party-vi > whoarder is tellurium 06/10/2016 at 08:28

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If you like yours that’s perfectly fine, but it’s a bit disingenuous to say the G sedan/coupe are a competitor to anything made by ze Germans.

nafsucof > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 08:39

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ESP how long in the tooth they both are

nafsucof > yamahog 06/10/2016 at 08:42

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Yeah but there is a big old difference in performance and the platform is all new and aluminum.

qbeezy > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 08:54

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I love Audi’s myself, but there doesn’t seem to be any design progression. When you have to look really really close to notice the”all new”changes, that isn’t a good thing. The A/S4. They’re had looked the same for a long time. The same with the A/S5. They’re getting long in the tooth. There’s nothing to lust after. There’s no hype or excitement like the golf R, focus RS.

qbeezy > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 08:55

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The sad thing is that I see more of a Passat in the 2017 than ever...

whoarder is tellurium > Party-vi 06/10/2016 at 08:56

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When did I say anything about competition? I was just referencing the hate on the FP.

My car is just fine.

Party-vi > whoarder is tellurium 06/10/2016 at 08:58

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That’s just my vitriol for the G35/37 coming out. I like my parent’s G37x, but I don’t think it’s a good car.

The Ghost of Oppo > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 09:05

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It’s called opinions , and people are allowed to have them, just like you.

Dave the car guy , still here > whoarder is tellurium 06/10/2016 at 09:14

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Everyones a hater on something and its nothing new. I’m old school and every car I’ve had in 45 yrs got hate from somebody. When we had Jeeps for years I got hate from the GM and Ford 4x4 guys. Everybody has an opinion and we all just need to be a little more teflon so the hate slides right off. I’m starting to feel sorry for all the Mustang owners who are catching hell because of the few assholes. Doesn’t matter if its style, reliability , performance or driver type all car makes catch hell at some point. I just say live with because there is worse stuff in life to worry about. BTW I’m on my 4th Audi but I have friends from Mustang clubs, Camaro clubs , Subaru fanboys, BMW and VW groups. If you just try a bit to merge with the other car cultures it becomes a more hospitable environment. We all have the common ground that we like cars in general and a bond can grow from that alone.

Chasaboo > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 09:23

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Because Audi is making their cars look more like Honda every year.

whoarder is tellurium > Dave the car guy , still here 06/10/2016 at 09:26

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Absolutely agree and thank you for posting.

Dave the car guy , still here > whoarder is tellurium 06/10/2016 at 10:01

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These guys think they get hate? Try working in a Chevy shop and switching to driving an Audi. After 15 years I’ve finally gotten respect. It came from being the first guy to work many times during snow storms.

fennelbreath > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 10:09

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Read the publication I work for* instead, then. I’m currently copy-editing a review of one of the new Audi products and it’s being praised to high heaven, so hard that I’m rolling my eyes a little bit. I haven’t driven any of them myself, yet, though.

*I’m not going to doxx myself, though.

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 10:09

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Probably because Audi’s are basically shoe sizes. They all look the same in varying sizes.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > jkm7680 06/10/2016 at 10:17

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I dislike modern BMWs. Just because I have one doesn’t make me a rabid fanboi.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 10:21

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I wouldn’t put it past an Audi driver to have done that.

GhostZ > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 10:25

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Because numbers aren’t interesting unless they’re significantly different.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > nafsucof 06/10/2016 at 10:26

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Brb gonna go dump a bunch of rocks on a new audi and see how it fares.

nafsucof > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 06/10/2016 at 10:33

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Haha make sure it's from like five feet over the roof.

BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather > qbeezy 06/10/2016 at 12:14

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There’s just so many changes under the skin and in the interior. I guess I just expected better than “hurr, durr, they don’t look different. So they must be the same!"

qbeezy > BugEyedBimmer - back in the Saddle Dakota Leather 06/10/2016 at 13:20

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I think they would be more forgiving if they had at least a radical change in at least one of their models. Like give the S5 a really aggressive body and stance that differentiates it from the fleet since 2011. Overall it seems Audi wants to play it safe. Can’t argue against that since diesel gate.